This is the question that begins most of my conversations as of late. Most everyone I know -- family, friends, co-workers, that guy on the bus -- knows that I'm leaving for Germany on September 2nd. And, as the date draws nigher and nigher (is nigher a word?), everyone wants to know if I'm excited. And I always go, "Weeeeeell, yes and no, sorta, kinda, in a way." It's a really vague answer, but it's all I've got. I mean, leaving for Germany has been like getting on a roller coaster.
The beginning of the summer, when I found out I was actually going, was like being at the bottom of the big hill. You're all excited and your stomach is full of butterflies and you're yelling "HERE WE GOOOO!!!" as the car goes chk-chk-chk up the hill. This is how I was. I was running around, sending documents to agencies all willy-nilly, yelling at everyone "HERE I GOOOO!!!"...
Then comes the actual climb up the first big hill. The initial giddy feeling has left you, but there's none of that just-at-the-edge thrill of being at the very, very top. There's just the chk-chk-chk of the car going up the hill as you become increasingly more and more nervous. You think to yourself, "Is this ride safe? Am I doing the right thing? Can I just get to the top already? THE ANTICIPATION IS KILLING ME!!! ARGH!!!" This was sort of the rest of my summer. See, I had sent off all the documents I could send off, so I was pretty much good to go. All I had left to do was wait. And think about Germany. And try not to make any big purchases. See, the closer I got to Go-Time, the more I thought about each purchase. Will I really use a whole bag of pasta before I go? Do I really need nail polish remover right now? This whole living as if I were just waiting for a definite end point got really tiring really fast. Can I just get to the top already? The anticipation is killing me!!! ARGH!!!
But now, dear readers, I am at the top of the roller coaster. There is no more chk-chk-chk, only the moment of so-slow gravitational pull as the ride commences. I'm about to go head-first into a most excellent adventure (Thank you, Bill & Ted) and so I'm all full of giddy/nervous energy, much like you would be at the apex of a roller coaster when you know all the waiting is over and you finally get to scream and laugh your head off on this wild ride. Time seems to be going by both very quickly and very slowly. I feel like I have a lot of time and not enough time at all. What a bizarre place to be! What a bizarre head space to occupy! I don't know what lies ahead of me -- I still don't have a bank account, a BahnCard, or an apartment in Germany -- but I am glad to be getting on with it, whatever it is. WHEEEEE!!!
The beginning of the summer, when I found out I was actually going, was like being at the bottom of the big hill. You're all excited and your stomach is full of butterflies and you're yelling "HERE WE GOOOO!!!" as the car goes chk-chk-chk up the hill. This is how I was. I was running around, sending documents to agencies all willy-nilly, yelling at everyone "HERE I GOOOO!!!"...
Then comes the actual climb up the first big hill. The initial giddy feeling has left you, but there's none of that just-at-the-edge thrill of being at the very, very top. There's just the chk-chk-chk of the car going up the hill as you become increasingly more and more nervous. You think to yourself, "Is this ride safe? Am I doing the right thing? Can I just get to the top already? THE ANTICIPATION IS KILLING ME!!! ARGH!!!" This was sort of the rest of my summer. See, I had sent off all the documents I could send off, so I was pretty much good to go. All I had left to do was wait. And think about Germany. And try not to make any big purchases. See, the closer I got to Go-Time, the more I thought about each purchase. Will I really use a whole bag of pasta before I go? Do I really need nail polish remover right now? This whole living as if I were just waiting for a definite end point got really tiring really fast. Can I just get to the top already? The anticipation is killing me!!! ARGH!!!
But now, dear readers, I am at the top of the roller coaster. There is no more chk-chk-chk, only the moment of so-slow gravitational pull as the ride commences. I'm about to go head-first into a most excellent adventure (Thank you, Bill & Ted) and so I'm all full of giddy/nervous energy, much like you would be at the apex of a roller coaster when you know all the waiting is over and you finally get to scream and laugh your head off on this wild ride. Time seems to be going by both very quickly and very slowly. I feel like I have a lot of time and not enough time at all. What a bizarre place to be! What a bizarre head space to occupy! I don't know what lies ahead of me -- I still don't have a bank account, a BahnCard, or an apartment in Germany -- but I am glad to be getting on with it, whatever it is. WHEEEEE!!!
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